I am A stay at home mom

I  struggled ( and still do somedays) with with the feelings of failure or like i am not a contributing member of the household . I have been a stay at home mom now for almost 3 years and i do babysit to help bring in a little income while my husband is in school for plumbing ( we got 1 more year left). I dont always feel like i am making a difference and that it would be easier to simply put them in daycare and go to work ( but that would be point less i would be working to pay daycare)  . I remember on the days that i feel like this that the benefits my children are recieving far out weigh the feelings i feel and we may not see the benefits or the difference right away but later on when our children are older we will . Being a stay at home mom takes alot of paitences and strength . One thing i miss is the Adult interaction that i had when i worked and the relationships i deleveoped .  Chris gets to have outside relationships from work and such that spills over into his outside of work time and that sometimes leaves me staying at home in the evenings as well . I have come to realise that i need to find other moms who are in the same stage of life as i am and am working on that. its hard cuz i babysit and alot of my friends are busy working or taking care of their own kids  .

Man time has gone so fast

Well it is June 13th already . It is amazing how quickly time is moving . In 3 days i will have a 5 yr old ( eeekkk) I can't believe the journey we have been on that started 6 yrs ago april 16th when we got married . Then June of 05 we found out we were expecting our 1st baby . Aug 13th Heaven gained a angel ( our 1st baby we were 3 months along , i think the baby was a girl) Oct 6th of 05 ( chris birthday) we found out we were expecting again i remember how nervous i was and scared after our 1st experience . Thankfully everything went very smoothly and on June 16th 2006 after 30 hours of labor at 9:19 am we welcomed a 7 lb 14 oz baby boy who we named Keaton James to our family . In 2005 we also bought our house and moved in with my grandma for 2 months well it was being built. After keaton was born we enjoyed watching him grow up day by day . When he was just over a yr ( august 2007)  i gained a awesome sister ( Jaymi) and he was the cutest ringbearer ever ( yes i am biast) . That following November we found out we were expecting again , and again i was nervous ( not sure why but i am a worry wart ) with this pregnancy everything went perfect and when we were 34 weeks along we found out we were adding another boy to our family  and 5 weeks later on July 12th after only 5 hours of labor Hayden alexander 8 lbs and 5 oz entered our family at 11:19 am . After we had hayden we travelled out to thompson to my brothers wedding where i gained another sister ( robyn) hayden was only 3 weeks but travelled very well . Also now that we had 2 kids i wanted to return to work even less then i did after keaton so i decided to venture into unknown territory and start babysitting for a living and gained awesome daycare kids . God has been good to us during this time we have never lacked for anthing we needed even with chris in school at different times . Just over a year ago from today we decided to start trying for our 3rd child and surprize one month after decided to try we found out our family was going to grow again . This pregnancy i figured would be easy but at 6 weeks i started spotting whic sent my stress level through the roof . Lots of ppl didnt understand why i was stressed and kept telling me to trust God that everything would be fine . I did trust Him it was just hard to let go of it and let him take care of it after 3 ultrasounds everything was fine and we were able to go on our vacation to see my sister in law and brother inlaw in grande prarie AB . and on  Feburary  8th  after a 3 hour labor we welcomed Micah Rowen weighing in at a whopping 9 lbs 5 oz at 3:29 am after having to be induced ( 1st time the last 2 were a week early , Micah was 10 days over due He was very content where he was ) I got exactly waht i prayed for a content baby ( which may be why he didnt want to come out) . This past thursday i took him to his 4 month appointment , so hard to believe that 4 months have gone by already . I am having a hard time believeing that this coming Septemeber i will have a kindergartener as well . A whole new stage has started for us . this July i turn 28 hayden turns 3 and in oct chris turns 28 . . Wow reading back on what i wrote its been quite a adventure but a amazing and wonderful adventure and i am looking forward to the next 6 yrs when by then another stage will start when all 3 kids will be full time in school . And yes we feel we are complete with 3 kiddos i am happy and ready to stop having kids i always said i would never have a odd number of kids but immediately after micah was born i knew i was complete . Well i better go and get ready for bed anothe busy day of daycare tomorrow